The striped top that made me rethink Bretons

Plus a great high street collab for the kids

Bits and bobs this week - starting with Bretons.

I’ve mentioned before how, when I had my first baby, I stopped wanting to wear striped tops. I have loads in my wardrobe and used to wear them regularly with jeans (a classic look!) but as soon as I became a mum they felt all wrong.

I think because Bretons are so closely associated with that stereotypical idea of what ‘mum uniform’ looks like (just add a practical coat and cross-body bag) which as we all know isn’t thought of as particularly sexy and chic. I feared being lumped into that box.

Also, I think I struggled to identify with a piece of clothing that is so on-the-nose ‘mum’, because I was struggling to identify as a mum. When my son was born (and actually my daughter, too) I felt like someone had given me their baby then walked off and left me to look after it.

I had a lot of ideas about how I would feel as a mother: patient, selfless, blissful, capable, endlessly loving, like I wanted to bake mini muffins instead of go to the pub. And when you don't feel like that - any of that - you can feel …like a fraud. Or like there's been some sort of mistake; a glitch in the motherhood matrix and you shouldn't have been let in.

So Bretons were out. Which is a shame because a stripe can really lift an otherwise boring outfit.

This week however, I went to a childrenswear event and bumped into a stylist friend, who was also has two small kids (one of which was with her), and she was wearing a striped top. It didn't look mumsy in the least. Worn with mid-wash blue jeans and black ballet flats, it looked simple and chic. And comfortable! And a bit French! And easy to do!

Hers was the below from Arket (£57) which is successful for two reasons. Firstly, the oversized cut is cooler and isn't going to make your boobs look like a shelf. Secondly, the brown/red stripe feels more modern than the traditional blue/white. I think it looks more expensive, too.

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It's been so mild in London recently that I've struggled knowing what outerwear to put on. I've also found that, since having kids, I run hotter than I used to (constant rushing around and mid-level anxiety has an insulating effect).

I was introduced to With Nothing Underneath’s overshirt (£160) at the brand’s press day and it struck me as the perfect solution - not too warm, but gives a little something extra. Founder Pip called it the underdog shirt, which I thought was spot on; it's the unassuming piece you didn't think you needed but becomes one of the most useful things to own.

We shan’t call it a shacket as that's too 2015, but it's essentially that. Something to chuck on when a coat is too warm but a jumper isn't enough. You could also use it to elevate a jeans and T-shirt outfit, and it would work well layered under a trench/ quilted jacket when it does feel chilly.

This is it in real life in the church hall loos at a four year-old’s birthday party.

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I had the above outfit in my mind when I saw this Fair Isle jumper (£49). Suitably festive without looking novelty.

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Something for the kids! I took mine to the GAP x Paddington Bear collaboration launch this week which was very sweet and completely manic (there was a bus! With cakes! My daughter ate a pot of clotted cream!). The collection is super cute (so many character clothes are just awful) and for any Paddington fan - like my son who is obsessed - it’s a surefire hit. Top hitters are the varsity jacket (£65) and the ruffle blouse (£25). This jumper (£30) is also good - and these teensy socks (£10) for very little ones. I thought a nice idea for Christmas presents… only 7 weeks to go!

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Two more things…

I found Alice Vincent’s piece on post-breastfeeding depression for Vogue incredibly moving. There are so many aspects of the motherhood experience that aren't spoken about, and the only result is women feeling alone. Even if this particular issue isn't your experience, Alice’s words re-emphasise what a tremendous transformation having a baby is. I find that hugely validating.

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One of my lovely MUMISH readers reached out the other day to ask about post-cesarean wardrobe essentials. Stretchy high-waist trousers are a must (these seamless pants look great, or these posh joggers). But make sure you take a nightdress in your hospital bag - I took pjs the first time around and quickly realised lifting my legs into trousers was impossible for the first 24 hours. This one is pricey but absolutely gorgeous and you could chuck on a cardi and big socks and wear it out of the house.

The biggie is knickers. You need something belly-button-high and softer than a cloud. For the first week or so, Frida Mom’s disposable pants will be your best friend. Then you want something that's going to be practical but makes you feel nice. Stripe & Stare do the softest pants around - these ribbed boxers look great.

That’s all for now. You’re doing great, Frankie x