A-list sweatpants and stretch marks
A serving of postpartum realness
If you're reading this while wearing a pair of crusty old joggers then take comfort in the fact Rihanna is too. In a cover feature with Interview released this week, the singer said her post-baby wardrobe majors on practicality and ease: “I spend my time getting the kids dressed to death, and then I’m like, “What’s the most comfortable outfit to wear around them? What’s not going to feel uncomfortable on their face or on their body or make me feel like I can’t hold them properly?” Moms are lazy dressers in real life.”
Now ok, Rihanna’s joggers probably aren't old and crusty. They're probably cashmere and very expensive. I'm sure her version of a comfortable everyday outfit involves designer labels and is far fancier than yours or mine (to that end her ‘diaper bag’ is a YSL mini tote. Lol.)
BUT her comment is a level of relatability that feels rare and unexpected. Leaving the house with immaculate children while chucking on whatever is in sight and clean (enough) yourself? Sounds familiar. Except I wouldn't call that lazy dressing - more time-short and too tired/overwhelmed to do otherwise.
On the subject of getting dressed after having kids, Rihanna continued: “Okay, I had two babies. You really have to push this up, snatch this in, or do an illusion of a little bit of skin here.”
She discusses her postpartum boobs: “I want my titties pinned back to my shoulders, right where they used to be”, and her third-trimester cellulite: "You just see ripples coming from places you never knew, and it’s all in your thighs, because your thighs are carrying the weight of your baby and uterus.”
Perhaps my favourite nugget is when, mid interview, she kicks her shoes off and tells the interviewee (Interview’s editor-in-chief Mel Ottenberg) not to look at her toenails. If I had a penny for every time I bemoaned my own manky un-pedicured feet…
She also captioned the below image from the accompanying photoshoot: “literally how I feel in postpartum with 2 under 2.” which is both funny and accurate.
In a time where celebrity snap-back culture is so prevalent, and it’s both normal and celebrated to look like you haven’t just had a kid when you have (see Sienna Miller at Paris Fashion Week) it’s quite radical for an A-lister to speak about the realities of being postpartum.
It’s also significant that it’s Rihanna speaking about it. She is one of the most influential figures in pop culture and has form in challenging the narrative around motherhood. Her high-fashion pregnancy wardrobe totally changed the maternity wear conversation (pregnant people want to look chic too? Who knew!). The effect of which can be seen on the high street where bump-friendly ranges have become increasingly better.
As for proving you can be hot and have kids, her sexy bump-baring outfits, cleavage and mini hemlines were a notable gear-shift away from the demure tent dresses more commonly expected during pregnancy. And dressed as a risqué nun on the cover of Interview, she’s as far away from the mumsy stereotype as you can get.
It’s especially refreshing to see all of this discussed in an über hip, high-fashion publication which would never normally go anywhere near mum stuff (you’re certainly not going to find a handy ‘10 of the best postpartum knickers’ page there). By making mum-style part of the fashion conversation, can Rihanna take away its drab connotations and give it a (well deserved) sense of cool? If anyone can it’s her.
If Rihanna’s sweatpants and stretch marks revelations weren’t enough, Suki Waterhouse also joined the postpartum conversation this week. The singer and actress, who recently gave birth, posted a picture of herself to Instagram wearing absorbent high-waist pants and a greige nursing bra, with a visible postpartum bump.
None of which should be surprising (I sported a similar look after giving birth) however, when it’s more common to see a new celebrity mum with washboard abs and wearing size-tiny jeans, it very much is.
In the accompanying social caption, Suki called her fourth trimester humbling. I can think of a few more: overwhelming, vulnerable, intense, confusing, messy, weird. In the first few weeks after having my first baby I felt desperately unprepared for most things, not least how my body would look and feel. I’d never seen a fourth-trimester tummy. I had no idea mine would be the texture of a waterbed for months – and that a year after my second birth I’d still have loose skin that hangs over my waistband.
I didn’t know stretch marks were so normal and that my boobs would go up and down a cup size in a day. Then wither into two deflated balloons once I stopped breastfeeding. Sob.
Like a lot of the less glamorous sides of motherhood (and indeed womanhood) this seems to be a taboo subject which isn't talked about nearly enough. And it’s doing all of those going through it a huge disservice. So too are the unrealistic bounce-back images and expectations we get instead.
How brilliant then to see more honest and relatable aspects being shared by the rich and fabulous. I only wish I’d seen something similar during my own postpartum meltdowns. For now though I'm taking solace in the knowledge Hollywood babes wear giant pants too, and my droopy boobs are in the very coolest of company.
5 things to make postpartum dressing easier
1. Pyjama pants you can leave the house in
Obviously elastic waistbands. I saw these from WNU (£120) in the flesh this week and they are just perfect. The hemp fabrication is heavier than linen so can be worn when it’s still a little chilly outside, but they still have that easy breezy waft. The wider waistband creates a great silhouette and there’s enough fabric in the crotch for you to wear them high or on your hips. And the boxer-inspired detailing gives a cool boyfriend look. They are pricey, but this brand is serious about making clothes that last (I am such a fan of the shirts) so you’re going to be wearing these for a while. If the green is too out there, they also come in classic navy.
2. Big soft knickers
Suki’s knickers are Fridamom disposable postpartum pants (£14.99 for 8) which I also wore after my second baby, and they were so comfortable and soft, especially on my C-section scar. I can’t recommend them enough – tell all your friends to pack them in their hospital bags. When everything has stopped leaking, Underdays Everday Brief (£20) are the pants to know about. So stretchy. So comfy. They have extra length in the gusset for better coverage and the crossover waistband detailing looks cute. I have two pairs – they are the best pants I own.
3. A nice hair clip
For when you haven’t washed your hair. Spritz some dry shampoo, twist and clip (£18).
4. Slip-on shoes
I had cesareans for both my kids and couldn't bend down for a while, which meant slip-on shoes only. Even after you're healed and good-to-go, slides are no-effort and ideal when you need to be quick. I'm not telling you anything you don't already know here but Arizonas (£100) are THE classic slip-on that work with all outfits. And yes, you can wear them with socks.
5. A chic vest top
When you’re awake at all hours, you want clothes that can go from bed, to sofa, to park. I found cotton vests a great base layer that I could wear a shirt, jumper or cardigan over the top of. Plus, they give good boob-access if you’re breastfeeding/pumping. These M&S ribbed vests (£8.50) come in loads of colours, can be machine washed and have straps wide enough to cover your bra.
One more thing…
I could write you an essay on how fine and flat my hair is. And that its fly-away texture is giving Jane Austen heroine yomping across a mizzly heath. And that I haven't been able to grow it past my shoulders in years. AND that so much fell out postpartum (both times) I cried in the shower (both times).
I was recommended Champo Pitta shampoo and conditioner (£38 for the set) after my second baby and MY GOODNESS. My hair is thicker, stronger and longer than it's been in… forever. I'm on my third set.
That’s all for now. You’re doing great, Frankie x
So funny . It’s not just after giving birth
..I just wanted to add
As a nana I was left
For the weekend with a 6 month old and a dog .we got
Out of the house okay baby looked
Gorgeous . I however had my top and bottoms
On inside out !!! It’s hard when you are old 🤦🏽♀️🤣